Tag: advice

You’ll soon celebrate your 19th wedding anniversary – what a wonderful milestone! You and the love of your life have spent almost two decades together, and next year you’ll mark 20 years of love.

You may already be thinking ahead and planning what you’ll give to your partner to celebrate your 20th anniversary, but it’s also important not to forget about your upcoming anniversary too. But, what sort of gift should you give your other half to celebrate 19 incredible years together?

Of course, there are classic anniversary gifts like flowers, chocolates and jewellery which always go down well. But, did you know there are also traditional and modern 19th anniversary gifts that couples have given to each other for more than a century? These gifts are filled with meaning and can make a gift stand out and be truly memorable.

The trouble is, what is the perfect 19th anniversary gift? Where do you start on the hunt for something that will surprise your partner so you have a wonderful anniversary as you begin the countdown to your 20th anniversary?

In this article, we’re going to explore all the traditional and modern 19th wedding anniversary gifts. We’ll also give you some ideas and suggest 50 gifts you can consider so you can treat your other half to something truly unique and filled with historical meaning.

For more information about all the anniversary gift-giving traditions from 1 year through to 90, read our complete year-by-year wedding anniversary gift guide.

What are traditional and modern gifts for a 19th wedding anniversary?

Giving a traditional- or modern-inspired gift to mark a 19th wedding anniversary is a tradition that goes back more than 100 years. The gifts follow a set theme and are filled with romantic meaning and symbolism, which helps you tell your partner exactly how you feel. It also helps you think a little outside the box and give them a gift that you might not ordinarily consider, making your anniversary stand out from other times when you might buy them a gift.

Many anniversaries have two different types of gifts associated with each of the traditional and modern themes. But, when it comes to your 19th anniversary, both the traditional and modern themes are the same. This might mean you have a little less room for variety, but it doesn’t mean you can’t have fun and not use your creativity. Plus, the meaning behind the gifts is still as poignant and special.

Traditional 19th anniversary gift – Bronze

The traditional theme to mark 19 years of marriage is bronze. Bronze was also the traditional gift to give for your 8th anniversary, so if you’ve been following the anniversary themes for a while, you may very well have given them something made from bronze before. But, that was over a decade ago now, so there’s no reason why you can’t revisit the theme if that’s the case.

Bronze is a combination of copper and tin, which are both fairly weak when separate, but when together they’re incredibly strong. It’s a little like your relationship, with the two of you being far stronger together than when you’re apart. Bronze is also a really versatile metal (as well as a fabulous colour) which offers you plenty of room to find something your other half will love.

Modern 19th anniversary gift – Bronze

The modern 19th anniversary gift is also bronze. This does mean your choice is a little limited, but because the choice of bronze gifts is so huge, you really shouldn’t have too much trouble finding something that suits your partner’s tastes. Bronze gifts can also be fairly affordable, so the theme fits with a range of budgets.

19th anniversary gemstone – Aquamarine

The traditional gemstone to give to mark your 19th anniversary is aquamarine, a gorgeously soft shade of blue that evokes a calm spring morning or a still, tranquil ocean. Aquamarine represents serenity and clarity, which is perfect when celebrating 19 happy years, as it’s something you’re more than likely all too familiar with. It’s often a fairly affordable stone, making it a great choice of gift, but some rarer aquamarines can be rather pricey, so make sure you shop around if it’s something you think would suit your partner’s taste.

19th anniversary flower – Chrysanthemum

If your partner would love to receive something floral on your 19th anniversary, the traditional flower to mark the occasion is the chrysanthemum.

Chrysanthemums have big, colourful blooms that represent happiness and long life. They’re also commonly available at florists and come in a wide range of colours, so you’ll never have to look too far to find a beautiful bouquet of chrysanthemums.

How do you choose a gift for a 19th wedding anniversary?

You may already have something in mind for the perfect gift to give on your 20th wedding anniversary. But, with your 19th anniversary not too far away, you may be thinking long and hard about what you can do that will be equally as thoughtful and memorable. The traditional and modern themes lend themselves brilliantly to gifts, but it’s possible that you’ve never really put much thought into them. So how do you choose a gift to give for your 19th anniversary? Here are a few things to bear in mind when making your decision.

• Is choosing a gift linked to the traditional or modern themes important to you? If so, the range of choice isn’t as wide as it is with previous anniversaries, but you can still have a lot of fun with bronze, chrysanthemums and aquamarine.
• What sort of budget do you have in mind? Bronze is a great theme if you’re on a budget because a lot of bronze gifts are actually pretty affordable.
• Are you keen to give your partner a personalised gift? Adding a custom touch to an item may be an important addition to an anniversary gift and thankfully, bronze is something that can be personalised rather easily.
• What sort of gift would your partner love to receive? Because there isn’t quite as much choice of traditional and modern gifts with your 19th anniversary as there is with other anniversaries, it might be a little trickier finding something that aligns with the things they love.

Is a couple in your life about to celebrate their 19th anniversary? What an exciting time! As part of the upcoming celebrations, you might wonder whether or not you can join in with the traditional and modern gift-giving traditions and give them something linked to bronze, chrysanthemum or aquamarine. Of course you can! These themes aren’t exclusive to the couple, so if you have the perfect gift in mind, you should definitely treat the couple – it’ll let them know just how much they’re loved and they’ll appreciate the lovely sentiment behind it.

50 ideas for a 19th wedding anniversary gift

With your 19th anniversary on the horizon, you may be on the lookout for a gift you can give to your partner that will let them know how much they mean to you. Because the traditional and modern themes are the same, you don’t have as much choice as you do with other anniversaries, but don’t let that put you off – you can still find something amazing that they’ll love to receive.

If you’re keen to give your other half something that’s closely linked to the themes but you’re not exactly sure where to start, we’re here to help. Here are 50 19th anniversary gift ideas so you can surprise your love on the big day.

20 traditional and modern gifts for a 19th wedding anniversary

When you’re celebrating your 19th wedding anniversary, the traditional and modern themes are the same, which is bronze. Bronze is a super strong metal that has a lovely warmth to it, and is versatile so it’s used in loads of different gift types. So, whatever sort of thing your partner loves, you’re bound to find them something they’ll be over the moon to receive. Below are 20 ideas for anniversary gifts that feature bronze so you can stick to this hugely sentimental theme.

1. A love life bronze sculpture

Because bronze is so strong, affordable and shiny, it’s the perfect metal for making sculptures out of. For the ideal gift that represents love through and through, a love life bronze sculpture is romantic and touching, and would look fabulous on display in the home.

2. Personalised bronze cufflinks

Has your other half hinted that they’d love a new pair of cufflinks for when the occasion calls for them to wear a suit? A fabulously on-theme gift for your anniversary is a pair of personalised bronze cufflinks, which means they can keep a constant reminder of your big milestone on them whenever they dress up.

3. A bronze cat chopstick rest

If you and your other half love ordering in the odd Chinese or Thai takeaway, or making a warming bowl of ramen at home, AND they love cats, this is the ideal gift for them. A cat chopstick rest is cute, on-theme and serves a brilliant purpose. They can come out to lend a hand every time they eat a meal with chopsticks.

4. A teeny tiny personalised bronze anniversary card

For an incredibly adorable and thoughtful gift your partner can hold on to forever, it doesn’t get any more romantic than a personalised bronze card keepsake. It’s unlike any other gift card you can give and will serve as a constant reminder about your love in the most delightful way possible.

5. A pair of unique bronze earrings

Bronze can be used to make loads of different types of jewellery, including earrings, which also makes them fairly affordable, especially when compared to jewellery made from precious metals. Bronze earrings come in a selection of designs and are suitable for different tastes and styles.

6. A bronze wall clock

For an on-theme gift which is not only subtle, but which will also have many, many years of use, a bronze wall clock can hang on the wall and fits with almost any decor or colour. Then, every time you or your partner checks the time, they’ll be reminded of your special anniversary.

7. A bronze photo frame

Bronze is the perfect colour to help make a photograph pop, as it’s fairly neutral but still has a great shine to it. A brushed bronze picture frame is a great on-theme way to give your partner one of your favourite photos together.

8. A petite solid bronze vase

Show your partner just how romantic you can be with a petite bronze stem vase. As the name suggests, it’s only small, but it makes a big impact, especially when used to display a single-stem flower.

9. A set of hand-painted copper wine glasses

Do you and your other half love to share a bottle of wine together? On your anniversary night, you could give them a set of hand-painted copper wine glasses and make it a night to remember.

10. A tree of life bronze pendant

For the nature-lover in your life, a tree of life pendant not only has a wonderful tree design, but is bronze and comes with a gold-plated chain, making it extra thoughtful and super special.

11. A whisky barrel oak and bronze ring

If your other half loves a glass of whisky, a wonderful choice of on-theme gift is a whisky barrel oak and bronze ring. Treat your partner to a ring like no other, with a contemporary design that makes a real statement.

12. A bronze planter

Because bronze has those shiny, earthy tones, it’s ideal for use as a planter. So, help your partner’s indoor plants really pop with a bronze round planter.

13. A bronze table lamp

Add a contemporary feel to your home with a fabulous bronze table lamp. The striking design draws the eye and brings light and life to any room.

14. A bronze love hearts sculpture

Tell your partner exactly how you feel about them with a love hearts bronze sculpture. This pair of linked hearts perfectly fits the theme and has so much meaning behind it that your partner won’t help but love it.

15. Bronze leaves wall art set

With a bronze leaves wall art set, you can add a vivid and attention-grabbing feature to any wall. It’s a really unique way to give a gift linked to the 19th anniversary theme and bring a fresh feel to a room – just make sure you’re confident your other half will love it first!

16. A bronze rose

Roses are a famous symbol of love, and a popular choice of gift to give on any anniversary. If you want to give your partner roses but also want to stick to the bronze theme, you could simply give them a bronze rose, which looks incredible and is guaranteed to never wilt.

17. A lovely bronze swirl bowl

For something small and stylish that your partner can put to good use, a bronze swirl bowl can be used in the kitchen or to hold jewellery or trinkets.

18. A bronze garden statue

We’ve already mentioned how bronze is a fabulous metal used for making indoor sculptures, but it’s also perfect for use outdoors because it doesn’t rust. A bronze garden statue is something your partner will be able to display proudly in the garden, and there are absolutely tons of designs to choose from so you’re sure to find something that suits their tastes.

19. A bronze snail paperweight

Does your partner spend a lot of time sat at their desk working or enjoying their hobbies? They could be accompanied by a bronze snail paperweight, which has oodles of character and can watch over their paperwork to make sure nothing is ever misplaced.

20. A bronze seven wick scented candle

There’s no better way to create a romantic atmosphere on your anniversary than with a candle. Actually, maybe there is – a bronze seven wick scented candle helps create a warm and cosy atmosphere so the two of you can get snuggly.

5 affordable gifts for a 19th wedding anniversary

With such a big anniversary coming up next year, you might look to save a few pennies this year so you can really spoil your other half for your 20th anniversary. That means, finding an affordable anniversary gift this year is possibly a good idea. Because bronze isn’t a precious metal, it can be relatively easy to find a low-cost gift that still has that extra special meaning. So, here are five suggestions for affordable 19th anniversary gifts.

1. A bronze anniversary card

Why not combine the traditional and modern gift with a greetings card, and give your partner a bronze anniversary card? It includes two handmade bronze wire hearts, which makes it totally fitting of the theme, and is hugely affordable.

2. Bronze lock and key keyring set

Do you feel like your partner has the only key to unlock your heart? If so, this bronze lock and key keyring set is a super meaningful token gift, as it helps you express how you feel and closely fits with the 19th anniversary themes. Your partner keeps one half and you keep the other, so you always have a subtle reminder of each other wherever you go.

3. A bronze old wren farthing gift bag

Back in the 30s, 40s and 50s, farthing coins were often made from bronze and had an adorable wren on one side and the king on the other. Give your partner a piece of the past with a bronze old wren farthing gift bag, which they can hold on to forever.

4. A bronze flower charm bracelet

When made from bronze, jewellery has a very vintage and retro feel to it. That includes this bronze flower charm bracelet, which has the feel of an antique piece of jewellery but without the enormous price tag.

5. An engraved bronze drinks stirrer

If your partner loves a cheeky cocktail or gin and tonic, an engraved personalised bronze drink stirrer is fun, affordable and will get a lot of use!

5 DIY gifts for a 19th wedding anniversary

Nothing says I love you quite like a gift you’ve made yourself. It shows how much thought and care you’ve put into your gift, especially if it’s something associated closely with the traditional or modern themes.

At first glance, you might think it’s impossible to make something out of bronze at home unless you have all the proper equipment. Well, bronze wire is incredibly cheap and a great material to use for arts and crafts! Here are five ideas if you’re looking to get hands-on and make your partner something unique.

1. DIY bronze wire art

Bronze wire can be used to make so many different things, including artwork. Basically, if you can imagine it, there’s a great chance you can make it. Check out this bronze wire art YouTube playlist for help and ideas for the sorts of art you can make using bronze wire.

2. DIY wire leaf earrings

Bronze wire has plenty more uses, and with little experience and only a few small tools, you can make some great DIY wire leaf earrings. Watch a simple jewellery video tutorial to find out everything you need to give it a go.

3. A crocheted chrysanthemum

Crochet is a pretty popular hobby these days, and if you have a crochet hook and some wool of your own, you can make some beautiful crocheted chrysanthemums that are as beautiful and bold as the real thing. Follow a video tutorial on the steps you need to take to make your own.

4. A DIY wire bracelet

Another great way to use bronze wire is by creating a DIY wire bracelet, which you can get really creative with and make a wide variety of designs. You do need a few tools, but you can create something really special. Watch a video tutorial for info on how to get started.

5. Bronze gild a photo frame

The art of gilding is adding decoration and protection to something using fine powder. This includes bronze, which you can use to gild anything from wooden photo frames to glass. You can pick up a gild set which has what you need to get started.

5 experience or activity gifts for a 19th wedding anniversary

Giving your partner a gift on your 19th anniversary is a gesture which they’ll definitely love and appreciate. But, to make your anniversary one they’re not likely to forget any time soon, you could treat them to an experience or activity. And, with a little creative thinking, you can make sure your anniversary activity fits with the traditional and modern theme. Here are five suggestions for what you and your other half could get up to on the big day.

1. A bronze crafting experience

Bronze casting is a super specialist skill and is something of a lost craft by today’s standards. Why not learn something new, and have a wonderful time together, by taking part in a weekend bronze casting experience? You’ll get hands-on and find all about what goes into this fantastic craft.

2. A bronze animal experience

This one definitely counts, even if the experience itself isn’t technically bronze-related. But, a bronze animal experience at New Forest Wildlife Park gives your other half the opportunity to get up close and personal with one of their favourite animals and a possible cuteness overload.

3. View Bronze Age artefacts at your local museum

The Bronze Age was more than 4,000 years ago and was named that way due to the people at the time discovering how bronze was such a valuable and versatile tool. There are loads of Bronze Age artefacts on display in museums around the country, so you could spend a day exploring history with the love of your life. Or, make a weekend of it and head to London to visit the British Museum!

4. Watch the Lionesses (and Lucy Bronze) play football

If you’re lucky enough that your anniversary takes place around the same time as an England Women’s international football match, you could take your other half to watch the Lionesses play. You may wonder how this is tied into the traditional and modern themes? Well, Lucy Bronze is a regular starter in the England team, of course!

5. A romantic bronze B&B getaway

There’s nothing quite like a romantic getaway where you and your partner can spend some quality time together. A bronze B&B gift experience gives you everything you need to have a romantic trip away.

10 19th anniversary gifts that contain aquamarine

The traditional gemstone to mark 19 years of marriage is aquamarine, a brilliantly blue stone which represents tranquillity, making it absolutely perfect thanks to the calming emotions it can evoke. Because aquamarines have such a wonderful colour, they’re usually a great choice, and they’re often used in all sorts of jewellery and accessories. If this lovely gemstone is something up your partner’s alley, here are 10 suggestions for gifts you might want to consider:

1. Earrings
2. A ring
3. A necklace
4. A bracelet
5. A broach
6. A locket
7. A watch
8. An anklet
9. A hairpin
10. Cufflinks

Aquamarine is a popular stone thanks to its captivating colour, but isn’t one of the most commonly used in jewellery. That being said, you still really shouldn’t have too much trouble finding aquamarine jewellery in high street or independent retailers. And at Bridebook, we’re partnered with a collection of fabulous jewellers, so make sure you check them out to see what kinds of pieces they have available.

5 floral-inspired gifts for a 19th wedding anniversary

If you’re thinking your partner might appreciate something floral for your anniversary, you really can’t go wrong with the traditional 19th anniversary flower, the beautiful chrysanthemum. They’re big, colourful blooms that work wonderfully as part of a floral arrangement, but also work just as well as the star of the show. Here are five suggestions if you’re keen to give your partner something bright and full of life.

1. A bouquet of chrysanthemums

There’s no way we couldn’t kick off this list and not include a bouquet of chrysanthemums. They’re big, bold and utterly beautiful and are available in so many different colours. 

2. A tiny personalised chrysanthemum in a bottle

As we’ve already highlighted, chrysanthemums are blooming huge… which is why a tiny personalised chrysanthemum in a bottle is an adorable, on-theme keepsake that can be personalised to make it even more special.

3. A chrysanthemum scarf

Because of their beauty, chrysanthemums make lovely patterns used on clothing and accessories. That includes this chrysanthemum scarf, which will keep you warm during those chilly months or as a fashionable accessory during the summer.

4. Chrysanthemum stud earrings

A pair of chrysanthemum stud earrings are highly detailed, with their open blooms letting you see each of the individual 50 petals. They’re also subtle enough that they can go with a wide range of outfits and different styles.

5. Chrysanthemum artwork

Chrysanthemums are just as beautiful in artwork as they are in person, and are a wonderful subject for all types of art. Chrysanthemum artwork will brighten up a room and draw anyone’s attention. 

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Happy Planning!

Guest article written by the lovely Laura Bareham. Laura is a queer wedding photographer based in Warrington, Cheshire, who focuses on creating a safe, inclusive environment for all couples. Laura wholeheartedly believes that your wedding day should be exactly how you want it, free from the shackles of expectation or tradition. Through a unique and unobtrusive storytelling approach, she creates photographs that capture the true personality and spirit of your wedding day. Outside of photography, Laura is happiest pottering in the garden, curled up with a book or watching corny police dramas.

You can check out Laura’s incredible work directly via her website or Instagram, or explore her wonderful profile right here on Bridebook. 

I’m Laura, and I’m a queer and inclusive wedding photographer based in Cheshire. I got engaged to my wonderful partner Soph in December 2023, and am currently fully immersed in my own wedding planning! I’ve always focused my business on being inclusive, providing a safe space for queer people to be themselves free of judgements or assumptions, and this has only become more important to me since planning my own wedding. 

Planning a wedding is a big undertaking for any couple: alongside all the joy and excitement are a whole raft of decisions to make, suppliers to book and tasks to tick off! With the wedding industry being largely focused on straight cisgender people, this process can be especially daunting for queer people. In my experience (and that of many of my queer couples), when people hear the word ‘wedding’, they automatically assume that it’s a heterosexual wedding. Whilst as queer people most of us experience this sort of assumption on a regular basis throughout our lives, it can be particularly challenging during such a sensitive, vulnerable, and personal time as planning your wedding.

Information and resources for queer couples are becoming easier to come by, but this area is arguably still lagging a fair way behind. Some might say that we shouldn’t need separate guidance or advice at all and that we should stop talking about the differences between cis-het and queer weddings, and so many queer couples have a positive, affirming wedding experience; but the reality is that queer people do often come up against additional challenges when planning their big day. In this article, I hope to provide a bit of information and some helpful tips to make that planning process a little smoother!

It’s important at this point to address the fact that there is no single queer experience, and no single wedding planning experience. I spend a lot of my life immersed in the wedding industry and know a fair bit about how it all works; however, that’s still just my perspective. Much of this article will also apply to queer and cis-het couples alike – we all move through the wedding planning process in our own way, every wedding is unique and there are no right or wrong answers.

Anyway, enough preamble – onto the useful stuff!

1) Beware tips and advice

Okay, this one might be a bit of a strange one to start with but bear with me. Anyone who is planning or has planned a wedding knows that unsolicited wedding advice is lurking around every corner, and it can be incredibly overwhelming knowing what you want to do with everyone and their dog sticking their two pence in. Unfortunately, there can also be those people who just don’t want to accept or understand the things that are important to you and who do not have your best interests at heart. Add to that the fact that the majority of online resources are cis-het focused, and your efforts to find useful advice and guidance can have you in a sweat in ten seconds flat.

At the end of the day, the only person who knows what’s best for you, is you. By all means, make those Pinterest boards, save inspo pics and ask your friends and family for help when you’re making decisions, but just remember that everyone views a wedding through their own lens. Your wedding day is about you, and ultimately, what you say goes!

2) Give yourself plenty of time to plan

Planning a wedding can throw up some big questions, not just about table plans and décor options, but about who you are, how you see yourself and what a wedding means to you. You’re likely to have different perspectives and opinions on things, so prioritise communication and make space to discuss each person’s priorities openly and without judgement. Forget everything you think you know about weddings; go through each element individually and establish how you as a couple relate to each element. There are no rules!

3) Think carefully about your guest list

I think anyone who has planned a wedding has found the guest list to be a point of contention at some point throughout the process! Whether it’s minimum or maximum numbers for your chosen venue, cost per head for the wedding breakfast or debates about plus ones, crafting your perfect guest list can be a challenge. Keep communication open and honest with your partner about guest list priorities and who each of you feels comfortable inviting to share your day with you.

It would also feel remiss of me not to mention negative reactions from friends, families and acquaintances at this point. Sending wedding invites can be a really vulnerable process, especially for queer couples. Not everyone is accepting of queer marriage, and the invite process can often bring homophobia into the light. One of my couples experienced several invite rejections from extended family members due to them ‘politely accepting our relationship but choosing not to attend because it is a queer wedding’. 

You may not be able to change people’s views, but you can decide who to invite to your wedding. Protect yourself from negativity and keep yourself safe wherever possible.

4) Approach traditions with caution

Wedding traditions are so hard-wired into many of us that it can be hard to think outside of the box when it comes to your own plans. Telly, films and the world around us have shaped our idea of what a wedding is ‘supposed’ to look like, and queer people are very rarely reflected within this. Your wedding is a celebration of you, and you can do as you please regardless of what’s ‘usually’ done.

There is also a lot of history attached to wedding traditions. Some good examples…

• In the Western world, a bride wearing white symbolised purity and virginity.
• Some say that bridesmaids come from a time when brides were seen as property to be kidnapped, stolen or killed by rivals, whilst others say it was to confuse evil spirits so they wouldn’t attack the bride.
• A bride being given away by her father used to signify a transfer of ownership from one man to another.
• Getting married in a church isn’t an option for the vast majority of queer people (on that note, if you’re looking for some inspiration for non-traditional wedding venues, check out this stunning styled shoot in Manchester City Centre).

You get the gist – these traditions are all but meaningless in the modern world whether you’re queer or not, yet they’re so often followed unquestioningly. 

That said, just because you’re planning a queer wedding doesn’t mean you have to do away with tradition entirely. If a tradition feels good for you, run with it! Just don’t feel pressured to do something that is at odds with your morals, relationship, or plain common sense just because tradition told you to.

When I think of a queer wedding that was the perfect blend of tradition, modernity and queer joy, I think of Jon and Jay. Check out their dreamy Cheshire wedding here.

5) Consider rethinking your wedding terminology

The possibilities here are endless. If you’re feeling a disconnect with traditional wedding terminology, why not come up with your own alternatives? In my experience I’ve come across alternatives such as ‘marriers’ instead of ‘couple’ (after all, not all marriages include a bride and/or groom and not all marriages consist of two people); ‘bests’ instead of bridesmaids and groomsmen; and a whole host of other terminology tweaks which have made peoples’ wedding days feel more ‘them’.

If you do decide to use alternative terms during your wedding planning and big day, consider sharing these with your suppliers and loved ones if you feel safe and comfortable doing so. As a supplier, I always do my best to use whichever terms, words and phrases make my couples feel most comfortable, and those who love and care for you should make an effort to do the same.

Which leads me neatly onto…

6) Choose wedding suppliers who align with your values and vision

There are so many incredible queer and inclusive suppliers out there! From venues to florists to ateliers to DJs, queer people and allies are everywhere and the wedding industry is no exception. Each individual supplier will contribute to the feel of your wedding day and your overall experience, so it makes sense to have a think about what’s important to you and book people who align with this.

I’ve met couples who have proudly planned their wedding using exclusively queer vendors, whereas for other couples this is much less of a priority. Not all queer vendors will include their sexuality on their websites, and not all allies will shout about it over socials. That doesn’t mean that they won’t provide a fantastic, safe and inclusive experience for you on your wedding day. Often, we just get a ‘feel’ for people and that will be different for everyone, so I’d recommend doing your research, having a good chat with suppliers before booking to make sure you feel comfortable with them, and going with your heart.

It can feel intimidating knowing where to start when it comes to booking suppliers, but there are lots of brilliant directories out there which provide a great starting point, including some fantastic queer-specific ones and, of course, Bridebook!

7) Give yourself permission to wear whatever makes you happy

“Well, you’re both brides so of course you’ll both wear a dress” – an actual thing an actual person said to my partner and I about our wedding. Gender expectations around attire is by no means limited to queer weddings, but it’s the type of comment that a lot of us hear during planning. 

The way we choose to present ourselves to the world is an incredibly personal choice, and it’s so important that on your wedding day you can wear something that feels good, feels affirming and feels you. Some of us instinctively know from the offset what we want to wear (I always knew it was going to be a dress for me), but others don’t have that same certainty. The heavy stereotypes around wedding clothing can also bring up some complicated feelings and emotions, so give yourself plenty of time to plan your outfit so you can navigate these moments without looming time pressures.

If traditional wedding clothing isn’t hitting the spot for you, try thinking outside the box:

• Would you feel comfortable moving away from ‘traditional’ wedding colours? What colours do you love? (Enter past bride El’s pink suit of dreams – check it out here).
• What clothes do you already own that make you feel great? Is there a version of this that you’d feel comfortable wearing on your wedding day?
• Consider shopping in less traditionally wedding-y places, such as high street stores, charity shops and eBay/Vinted.
• Whilst this may not be an option that is financially viable to all, you might consider having an outfit custom-made, giving you total freedom over what you want to create.
• It’s also worth doing a bit of an audit of your friends and family’s skillsets – you might already know someone who can put together the wedding outfit of your dreams!

One of my 2024 couples is the perfect example of doing-what-works-for-you – they’ve made their own dresses, neither are wearing white and they’ve shared every step of the creation process. The result is two very happy brides with completely custom outfits which are going to make them feel absolutely incredible on the day! Nobody should have to compromise on that kind of feeling.

8) Choose your shopping experience wisely

There are expectations at literally every turn when you’re planning a wedding, and shopping for your wedding outfit is no exception (especially for brides). I know when I was shopping for my wedding dress, I felt a bit paralysed by how to go about it, especially as I wasn’t planning to have a traditional bridal party – who was I supposed to invite? Would my mum be hurt if I didn’t ask her to go with me? What if I loved something, but didn’t get the reaction I wanted from the people who were with me? Did it all have to be such a big deal?

In the end, the appointments where I felt most comfortable were the ones I went to on my own. For some of them, I didn’t even tell anyone I was going. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, cut the noise and consider shopping alone, or carefully choose the person that you feel is going to give you what you need during that experience. Also, if in-person shopping gives you the ick, start your research online and create a focused shortlist of places that feel safe and comfortable for you to visit.

9) Think flexibly about hen/stag celebrations

Another area of wedding planning that is rife with traditions and expectations is hen and stag celebrations, and these expectations are also heavily gendered. This may mean that some queer couples feel a significant disconnect with the idea of a hen or stag do – Soph and I definitely did! It’s fair to say that these kinds of celebrations aren’t for everyone no matter what kind of couple you are, but if you do want to celebrate with loved ones without the heavily gendered traditions, here is a reminder that your hen or stag do can look however you want it to. Consider having a joint celebration, invite anyone you want regardless of gender, call it by a different name if hen or stag doesn’t feel like a good fit, steer clear of gendered gimmicks… or don’t have one at all if you don’t want to! 

10) Do your research around honeymoon destinations

For many queer people, checking how safe and accepted we’ll be in any given destination is a standard part of planning any holiday. This becomes even more important during honeymoon planning, as more couples consider far-flung destinations where legality and culture can vary significantly to countries closer to home. In some popular honeymoon destinations, such as the Caribbean and the Maldives, homosexuality is still illegal; other countries have relaxed their laws around homosexuality in recent years, but local culture is still not welcoming to queer people and therefore visiting may not be safe. 

There are many wonderful honeymoon destinations where queer people are welcomed with open arms including most parts of Greece, Thailand and Italy, so there are still great options out there – just make sure you do your research before you book. 

11) Do whatever you want

I guess this really just sums up the whole article. Ultimately, your wedding is your day and how it plays out is your choice. If something works for you, do it. If it doesn’t, don’t! By all means, ask those you trust for advice and support where needed and utilise the enormous raft of general wedding-related information and inspiration available online, but just be sure not to lose sight of the most important thing – you!

If you’re looking for a bit more queer wedding inspiration or information, I’ve got a few more blogs over on my website that you might find interesting:

• How to make your wedding more inclusive
• Inclusive wedding venues in Manchester
• LGBTQ+ wedding songs
• Jack & Russ’ intimate Staffordshire wedding

A huge thank you to Pippa Volans, Esme Whiteside, Kieran Bellis, my couples and my loved ones who generously shared their thoughts, feelings and experiences to help me write this article.

If you’re about to celebrate your 17th wedding anniversary, congratulations! 17 years of marriage is an incredible achievement and one you’re no doubt excited to celebrate. In some cultures, the number 17 is considered unlucky, but that clearly doesn’t apply to you as you prepare to celebrate this amazing milestone.

One thing you might like to do on your 17th anniversary is treat your partner to a gift and show them just how much they mean to you and always will. But, what kind of gift do you give to the love of your life at this stage in your marriage? Well, did you know that for more than 100 years, there have been gifts traditionally given by couples to each other? That’s right, it’s not just the big milestones like your 10th anniversary or 25th anniversary where this applies. There are also traditional and modern gifts for your 17th anniversary.

These gifts go beyond the usual box of chocolates and have an extra special meaning behind them which makes them worthy of such a fabulous milestone. Not that a box of chocolates or any other type of gift isn’t amazing, but the symbolism behind the traditional and modern gifts takes your gift-giving to the next level.

In this article, we’re going to take a look at what the traditional and modern 17th anniversary gifts are, as well as the traditional gemstone and flower. We’ll also give you 50 suggestions for gifts to consider so you can spoil your other half with something full of love and meaning.

For more information about all the different traditions surrounding anniversary gifts from 1 to 90 years, read our complete year-by-year wedding anniversary gift guide.

What are traditional and modern gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary?

Both the traditional and modern anniversary gifts for 17 years of marriage have been given by couples to each other for more than a century. These gifts are packed with symbolism, which is what makes them such a thoughtful gesture, as they let your partner know how you feel about them. They’re not something you must get for them; of course, any gift is brilliant and will surely be well-received. But these traditions help make your anniversary that little bit more special.

Traditional 17th anniversary gift – A watch

The traditional gift for celebrating 17 years of marriage is a watch. Watches symbolise the passing of time, and your past, present and future as a couple. It’s not exactly a gift that you can have too much creativity with (although there are ways, which we’ll show you below). A watch was also the modern gift for your 15th anniversary, so if you didn’t get your partner one two years ago, it’s definitely something to consider now.

Modern 17th anniversary gift – Furniture

If you’d prefer to give your partner the modern 17th anniversary gift, you’ll want to give them furniture. Initially, it may seem a bit of a strange gift, but it represents comfort and familiarity, which actually makes it very meaningful. You might not necessarily want to get your partner a flatpack wardrobe (unless they’ve asked for one or you think they’d love it – in which case, go for it!), but there’s a lot of fun you can have with the theme.

17th anniversary gemstone – Carnelian

The traditional 17th anniversary gemstone is carnelian, a fabulous red and brown semi-precious stone that is said to boost creativity and self-esteem. When it comes to your relationship, carnelian protects your marriage and brings your energy. Carnelian isn’t one of the most commonly used stones in jewellery, but you should still have a lot to choose from so you can find something perfect for your partner.

17th anniversary flower – Red carnation

The traditional 17th anniversary flower is the red carnation, a beautifully big, bold bloom which isa wonderful addition to any bouquet, but which also works perfectly well as the star of the show. Carnations represent love and devotion, so could there be a flower more appropriate to give to your other half when celebrating 17 years of loving marriage?

How do you choose a gift for a 17th wedding anniversary?

Buying the perfect gift for your other half for your 17th wedding anniversary can be a tricky decision. There may be  a lot of choice, but the themes are perhaps not the most obvious when it comes to a romantic gift your partner would love to receive. Your partner might not wear a watch or have heard of a carnelian before, and there might not be any room for more furniture in your home.

But don’t let this sway you just yet. Before you make your decision, there are a few things to consider.

• Is sticking to one of the anniversary themes important to you? If it is, you’ll want to figure out a way to make the themes work for you.
• Have you agreed on a budget? Watches and furniture can vary wildly in price, so both would suit a variety of budgets.
• Do you want to give your partner a gift that can be personalised? Watches are easier to personalise than furniture, but that’s not to say it’s impossible.
• What sort of gift might your partner like to receive? Maybe you’ve spoken about themed gifts or they’ve dropped hints about something else they might like instead.

Is a couple you love about to celebrate their 17th anniversary? If so, you might be on the hunt for a gift and wonder whether you can get in on the action and give them a gift also linked to either the traditional or modern themes. These themes are for everyone, not just the couple, so if you’ve thought of the perfect gift which also just happens to be on theme, then you should definitely feel free to join in on the fun. The theme isn’t exclusive to the couple and shows them just how much you care by putting in that extra bit of thought and effort.

50 ideas for a 17th wedding anniversary gift

The 17th anniversary themes aren’t quite as obviously romantic as they are with other anniversaries. But, you might still be keen to honour the traditions and give your partner a gift filled with historical meaning. With a little creativity you can give your partner something they can enjoy and treasure for many years to come – but where do you start? Thankfully, we’re here with 50 ideas for 17th wedding anniversary gifts to help you choose something for your other half.

10 traditional gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary

The traditional 17th wedding anniversary gift is a watch, which is a gift that’s fairly self-explanatory so doesn’t leave many options for fun and creativity. But, there are still ways to do something a little different and unique, even if they don’t seem obvious at first. Here are 10 ideas so you can give your partner a watch they’ll never want to be apart from.

1. A carnelian eWatch watch

With a carnelian eWatch watch, not only do you give your partner a pretty swish-looking watch, but it’s also got a carnelian face which can be personalised to include your names and the date of your wedding or anniversary. It’s available in his and her designs and is a beautifully subtle gift your partner can always wear.

2. An engraved wooden watch

For a watch that’s bold and rustic but still incredibly stylish, you might want to choose an engraved wooden watch. It’s made to order and includes a custom message on the back so your other half can always keep a part of you close by.

3. A 17th anniversary watch gift box

This smart men’s Openwork Watch is presented in a gift box complete with a personalised message, and you really can’t go wrong with a 17th anniversary watch gift box. The back of the watch is also open which allows you to see the intricate workings inside.

4. A carnelian ring watch

For something incredibly unique, a carnelian ring watch is a personalisable watch that your partner can wear around their neck. It also features a callback to the 17th anniversary gemstone which makes it a double-hitter.

5. A rose gold watch gift set

Spoil your partner on your anniversary with a rose gold watch gift set. It covers the theme with the inclusion of a lovely rose gold watch, but it also comes with earrings, a necklace and a bangle, providing your other half with every accessory they might need for a big night out.

6. A carnation gold mesh watch

Combine the traditional gift and the traditional flower with a carnation gold mesh watch, a multifunctional watch that has a business-chic feel. Because it covers two traditional gifts, it has double the symbolic meaning, too.

7. A unique Mr Jones watch

If your partner has a style that wouldn’t necessarily be described as ‘normal’, then a bog-standard watch probably won’t push their buttons. Instead, you could get them a unique Mr Jones watch, which comes in a variety of incredible designs, including lazing in the pool, pinball-playing robots and a motorway road sign.

8. A delicate walnut and walnut watch

For a delicate but beautiful way to tell the time, a Holzkern walnut and walnut watch is reminiscent of a bracelet but versatile so that it can go with a wide range of styles and outfits.

9. A personalised photo watch

To give your partner a watch like no other, a personalised photo watch will really do the trick. You can customise the face by uploading your own choice of photo, which could be the two of you, your cat, or maybe even your kids.

10. A watch for a charm bracelet

Does your partner have a charm bracelet and love collecting charms to add their own personal memories which can be swapped out? If so, then a watch charm for a charm bracelet is a tiny perfectly on-theme gift which your partner can wear and which will always remind them of your amazing milestone.

10 modern gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary

If you’re not sure that your partner would love a watch or you gave them one for your anniversary a couple of years ago, you might want to choose the modern gift, which is furniture. Furniture isn’t often considered something you might give as a gift – after all, have you ever tried to wrap up a sofa? That said, furniture is a rather broad theme, so cancel that trip to DFS and take a look at these 10 suggestions for furniture-themed gifts which don’t necessarily mean forking out for a new three-piece suite.

1. A pair of smart bedside tables

We bet that if most of us are honest, our bedside tables are probably past their best. So, you could take the opportunity to pick up a pair of smart bedside tables and bring a breath of fresh air to your bedroom.

2. A lovely new rug

Transform any room in your home by giving your partner a lovely new rug for your anniversary. There’s nothing quite like the feeling of a new rug between your toes. Many retailers sell rugs, but they have a great selection over at Rug Shop to suit all styles, tastes and budgets.

3. A modern bookshelf

For the avid reader in your life, a modern bookshelf provides you with a contemporary way for your other half to keep their favourite books in order.

4. A sit-stand desk

If your partner works from home regularly and often complains about their back, then this gift sounds like it was made for them. A sit-stand desk can be adjusted quickly and easily, so your partner can choose to either sit down or stand up. They’re also said to improve productivity and posture, so it’s a win-win.

5. A comfortable armchair

There’s nothing quite like climbing into a big, comfortable armchair to enjoy a book, watch a movie, have a nap or any of the other things your other half might like to do in an armchair. Check out Marks and Spencer’s range of armchairs to find one that suits your decor.

6. A coffee table arcade machine

For the retro gamer in your life, give them the surprise of a lifetime by switching out your old coffee table and replacing it with a coffee table arcade machine. These tables are completely customisable, include two sets of controls for multiplayer madness and come loaded with more than 1,000 games.

7. Design-your-own coffee table

We bet you haven’t got another piece of furniture quite like this at home. A design-your-own coffee table lets you upload your own photograph which is then printed and handmade, so you can give your partner a one-of-a-kind gift to mark your big day.

8. A romantic loveseat

Give your partner a gift that lets you get snuggly on date night, with a romantic loveseat. They’re available in loads of different colours, styles and designs, so finding one that suits your home shouldn’t take long.

9. Floating book bookshelves

Floating book bookshelves let your partner display their favourite books seemingly by magic, which is great for creating a fun and unique way to store their books.

10. A hardwood storage box

If you have a little room at the end of your bed, a hardwood storage box provides ample storage space for bedding, towels and cushions, while being a centrepiece that can help bring a room together.

5 affordable gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary

Both the themes of a watch and furniture are rather different, meaning you can certainly choose to give your other half a unique gift to mark your anniversary. But, both can also be quite expensive, which might not be suitable if you have a smaller budget. That  said, with a little creativity, if you’re only looking to give your partner a small token gift, you can absolutely do that without the need to spend more than you’d like. Here are five suggestions for cheap 17th wedding anniversary gifts.

1. A cute pair of chair stud earrings

There’s nothing to say the furniture theme has to be something life-size. This pair of chair stud earrings is incredibly cute and a funny yet thoughtful way to incorporate the modern theme into your gift.

2. A furniture-themed anniversary card

If you’re planning to give your partner an anniversary card, you could make sure it’s linked to the modern gift by getting them a furniture-themed anniversary card. It includes a great sofa-related pun, and who doesn’t love a good pun?

3. A bag of retro candy watches

Give your partner a sweet (literally) and affordable gift in the form of a bag of retro candy watches. They wrap around your partner’s wrist so they have a sweet treat on hand (also literally) at all times. That is, unless they scoff them all first, which is likely.

4. A Casio unisex watch

It might not have all the glitz and sparkle of an expensive watch, but at the end of the day, a Casio unisex watch tells the time and that’s all many of us expect from a watch. A solid and dependable affordable gift.

5. A pocket watch necklace

Not only is a pocket watch necklace a fabulously affordable gift, but it’s also fashionable and a quirky way to stick to the traditional 17th anniversary theme.

5 DIY gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary

If you really want to do something unique and special for your anniversary, you might consider making your partner’s gift yourself. Okay, so making your own furniture or watch from scratch might be a tall ask unless you have prior experience, but it’s not impossible. There are ways to get creative or pick up a kit so you can have a stab at doing something. Here are five ideas to get those creative juices flowing.

1. Decorate your own stool

You can really have some messy fun by decorating your own stool in a way that your partner will love. Be as imaginative as you like, whether it’s adding colours, cushions, a photograph, crystals… the possibilities are endless. Just pick up a cheap stool from IKEA and get to work!

2. Upcycle an old piece of furniture

Upcycling is a brilliant way to take an old, tired piece of furniture and turn it into something fresh and modern. It makes for a fun project, lets you have a creative outlet and leaves you with a fab gift at the end of it. You can find affordable furniture at charity shops and auctions, and there’s information on ways to upcycle furniture available online.

3. Make your own cosy pet bed

Do you and your partner have a beloved furbaby whom you love dearly and who can do no wrong? Well, one thing you might want to make for your partner (but really for your four-legged friend) is to make them a pet bed that’s completely one-of-a-kind. There are video tutorials available online to give you a helping hand.

4. A Swiss watchmaking kit

Watchmaking is a tough but hugely rewarding skill, but it can be even tougher knowing where to start. If you’d like to have a go at making your partner a watch for your 17th anniversary, a Swiss watchmaking kit provides you with everything you need.

5. A DIY wooden clock

Okay, so this one is bending the rules, but only slightly – because a clock is just a big watch, right? But it’s too good not to include. A DIY wooden clock kit is a simple way for you to create a custom clock to include anything from colours to photographs.

5 experience or activity gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary

If you’re looking for a way to make your 17th wedding anniversary extra special, why not whisk your partner away so the two of you can enjoy an activity or experience together? You don’t necessarily need to go to Paris or sit down for a Michelin-star meal either. You can tie what you do into the traditional and modern themes to make them even more memorable. So, here are five suggestions for new and interesting things to do.

1. A furniture-making course

If you and your partner have ever fancied having a go at making some furniture yourself, then a furniture-making course could just be the ideal gift. There are a range of courses available, from upholstery workshops to stool-making courses.

2. Browse ancient furniture at the V&A

The Victoria & Albert Museum is an amazing museum in South Kensington, just a little south of Hyde Park. It features incredible exhibits around art and design, including a huge collection of furniture which goes back hundreds of years. It’s the perfect way to incorporate the modern theme into an anniversary trip to London.

3. A watchmaking workshop

So much goes into watchmaking. It’s a time-consuming (see what we did there?) and intricate skill to learn. But, with a watchmaking workshop, you can find out all about what goes into it, and even have a go at it yourself.

4. Take a romantic trip to Basel, Switzerland

Switzerland is known for producing some of the best and most luxurious watches in the world. If you have the time and budget, you might consider a weekend away to Basel, which is even home to an annual watch fair. Check out Lonely Planet for more information on exploring Basel’s must-see attractions and planning your next getaway.

5. A trip to Coventry Watch Museum

For something a little bit different, take a trip back through time (we just can’t stop with these puns) and view a huge collection of antique watches at Coventry Watch Museum. You’ll have the time of your life (sorry, we’ll stop now)!

10 17th anniversary gifts that contain carnelian

If you’ve got your sights set on a piece of jewellery to give to your partner on your 17th anniversary, they’ll no doubt love it. But, you could tie that jewellery into the theme by making sure it contains the traditional 17th anniversary gemstone, which is carnelian. It’s not one of the most commonly used stones in jewellery, but its reddish-brown colour makes for a great addition to a variety of pieces (usually gold). You might want to consider the following pieces that can be set with carnelian:

1. Earrings
2. A ring
3. A necklace
4. A bracelet
5. A broach
6. A locket
7. A watch
8. An anklet
9. A hairpin
10. Cufflinks

Because carnelian isn’t one of the more popular gemstones, it can be a little more difficult to find a piece you think your partner might love. High-street and independent jewellers may have a small range of pieces which include carnelian, but you may have to visit various stores. At Bridebook, we’ve partnered with loads of brilliant jewellers, many of which have a selection of carnelian jewellery. Make sure you check them out in your search.

5 floral-inspired gifts for a 17th wedding anniversary

Flowers are a worldwide symbol of love, so you may be considering giving your partner something blooming brilliant on your anniversary. The traditional 17th anniversary flower is the red carnation, a big brightly coloured bloom that’s full of life. It works great in a bouquet, but also as the inspiration for other gifts. Here are five suggestions for carnation-inspired gifts.

1. A bouquet of red carnations

A bouquet of red carnations is a vibrant, bold and beautiful gift to give to your partner to mark your anniversary. Just an explosion of vivid colour which lets them know exactly how you feel.

2. Handmade red carnation earrings

If your partner likes to wear fabulously unique earrings, then a pair of handmade red carnation earrings might be right up their street. They’re unique but subtle enough to be worn on a wide variety of occasions.

3. A red carnation bowl

For a touch of retro class, a red carnation bowl is a versatile and perfectly on-theme gift that’s also beautiful and practical. It ticks all the right boxes.

4. A hand-knitted carnation

Give your partner a floral gift that’s guaranteed to never wilt in the form of a hand-knitted carnation. A super romantic and token gesture which they can hold on to forever.

5. A preserved carnation flower sphere

Light up your partner’s life with a preserved carnation flower sphere. It encapsulates a carnation in resin so it can be displayed on a desk or shelf, and also doubles as a lovely little nightlight or lamp.

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Browse other similar articles…

• The Ultimate Wedding Anniversary Gift Guide
• 1st Wedding Anniversary Gifts: 50 Anniversary Gift Ideas
• 2nd Wedding Anniversary Gifts: 50 Anniversary Gift Ideas
• 16th Wedding Anniversary Gifts: 50 Anniversary Gift Ideas

Happy Planning!